Our Fostering Journey

 You may remember that Baby K moved in with her parents in the beginning of April. However, we have still been watching her 5 days a week (including weekends) while her parents worked, so it didn't really feel like she had left. It has been a great transition time. But on Monday she started full time day care. While we're still hoping to babysit occasionally, K no longer needs us on a regular basis. 

Our foster license is set to expire in October. After six years of fostering, we are not going to renew our license. There are three main factors that led us to this decision (in my opinion). 

1. We are worn out. 

 Since Micah was born (almost 16 and half years ago!), we have almost always had at least one child aged 4 or under. (Cumulatively, we've had about 24 months where this was not the case.) Scott and I have raised 5 newborns, two of whom had sleep issues for a long time due to substance exposure in utero. We are old and tired. 

2. We want more family time.

Along the same vein, when you always have a baby or small child, you don't get to enjoy the luxuries of having "big kids". We've spent most of the past 16 years working around nap times and feeding schedules and lugging diaper bags and strollers. If we want to go for a bike ride or go to a movie or stay late at a party or ride a roller coaster or play a board game or many other things, we either had to plan ahead for a babysitter or split up. As Micah enters his junior year of high school, we are incredibly aware that our time as a family of 5 is rapidly dwindling. We're looking forward to the freedom and flexibility to spend more time together.

3. We have a lot going on. 

Have you ever seen the Jim Gaffigan bit about having a fourth kid? He says, "If you want to know what it's like to have four kids, just imagine you're drowning...and then someone hands you a baby." 😂 I wouldn't say that we're drowning, but we have a lot of responsibilities and relationships that could use some more attention. Scott, in particular, has been doing the equivalent of 2.5 full time jobs over the past couple of years with work and church and coaching and parenting. I've leaned heavily on friends and community when we were overwhelmed, and I'm looking forward to being able to have the space to serve them for a change, including providing respite for other foster parents.

As we close this chapter of our lives, here's a little summary of our three girls. 

Elle - came to us at 17 months and lived with us for a year. Since then she has been living with her grandma and sister. Grandma and I have become friends. We text often and see them regularly. (Grandma posts on social media, so I don't think she'll mind me sharing a picture.)

Oct 2018 - 17 months old

last week - 7 years old

Little Peanut - came home with us from the NICU in January 2020 and stayed until December 2022. She was adopted by biological family and lives with her adopted mom, dad, brother, and new baby sister. We get occasional texts and updates - she is adorable as ever and doing well. She is now 4.5 years old. 

January 2020

on her adoption day, "saying goodbye to the court system forever"

Baby K - came home with us from the NICU almost exactly a year ago, in June 2023. She lived with us for about 9.5 months, plus an additional 2.5 months of daytime childcare. She is a year old, living with mom and dad, happy and thriving. 

June 2023

June 2024

 

This journey has been incredibly hard and absolutely worth it. 

December 2018 with Elle

January 2024 with K

Matthew at Camp

 When I signed Matthew up for camp, he didn't have any friends who were planning to go that week. Thankfully, two friends who were on the wait list ended up getting in! One was in his cabin, and the other was next door. 

He came home completely exhausted and a little under the weather, but overall had a good week. 

Hannah at Camp and Matthew's Birthday

 Hannah and Gwen went to camp together again this year. The past two years they've had lots of familiar faces, but this year they made new friends. It was an incredibly hot week, but they came home saying they had a great time. 

Gramme came while Hannah was at camp. She stayed an extra day so she could see Hannah before heading home. (Hannah is standing on her tiptoes.)

While Hannah was gone, Matthew turned 11! He celebrated by taking a few friends to Top Golf. 

These boys just love spending time together. They are a hilarious mixture of silly and sweet. For their age, they have a lot of maturity when it comes to balancing competitiveness with kindness. 

Yucatan

 Micah returned to Chikindzonot in the Yucatan Peninsula with the high school group from church. Similar to last year, they did a variety of work - teaching English, running a VBS, door-to-door evangelism, and manual labor. It was much hotter this year, and they dealt with power outages and lack of cell service. But the leaders said that the students handled every challenge amazingly well.

Micah and Carter

All the students and leaders

Almost half of the students on the trip go to Tallmadge High School. It's pretty remarkable considering that of all the other students, there are no more than 2 or 3 that go to the same school. I'm so thankful that Micah gets to have a great group of friends at both church and school!

VBS

door-to-door

This little girl, Lupita, was very attached to Micah. When other students tried to engage with her, she would say no and ask for "mi amigo". 

They played some soccer games and basketball with local groups.

June

 June has been a month with a lot of packing and unpacking. The first week we went to New Hampshire for my dad's memorial service. The second week Micah went to the Yucatan Peninsula. The third week Hannah went to Camp Carl, and then Matthew went the following week. 

There were over two hundred people at my dad's service. It was meaningful time of talking about his life, his faith, and what he meant to so many different people. 

Sweet Christina came from Boston to support Scott and I. She was a very bright spot on a tough day.

The following day, most of the family members took the cog railway up Mount Washington. My dad enjoyed hiking and had some special memories in this area, so it seemed like a good place to remember him. 

Mt. Washington is known for its extreme weather, but God gifted us a pocket of clear sky for most of our time at the top. 

Other miscellaneous things...

We have been watching Baby K when her mom is at work.

One night we came home from soccer to find a neighborhood kickball game in full swing in the cul-de-sac. Matthew quickly changed out of his cleats so he could join in. 

We were gifted a pool table that a friend no longer had room for.

Matthew and Scott finished up a great soccer season. I think they're both looking forward to doing it again next spring.